ebenezer mc cullough

 

Ebenezer McCullough was a hardened alcoholic

Pouring gin upon his flakes and whisky in his tea

Breakfast over he’d adjourn

To his games he would return

All the while still drinking

And always, always thinking

Of his next dose of booze.

His mum was not amused

She stopped giving him her cash

And tried to hide his boozy stash

But alas, to no avail, the lad he just kept boozing,

He was cruising for a bruising.

She telephoned the doc to see her only son

He arrived quite promptly, at eleven thirty-one

But as he heard the doctor’s knock

Ebenezer did his bedroom lock.

All attempts to lure him out,

His ma, the doc, they came to nowt.

The lad thought alcohol ‘twas his friend

Ironically it caused his end!

They found him lying on his bed

An empty six pack by his head.

The moral of this tale is clear

There’s nothing wrong with drinking beer,

Wine, or whisky, cocktails too

Just make sure it’s not killing you.